South Africa vs Wales
It’s the Rugby World Cup! And you know what that means. Yes! Super-insightful and timely running commentaries on all three four of the Welsh games right here, on WYWG! As always in WYWG’s “live” sports blogs, the normal and amusing words like these are written by me, WYWG, and the [bracketed, italic, and dreary words like these] are written by WYWG’s close ally, Tom. Apologies for the delay in this first update. I know you were all eagerly expecting it on Tuesday afternoon. WYWG’s excuse is that WYWG was on holiday in Tuscany. [No excuse for neglecting WALES!] We hope to resume normal scheduling [i.e. just a few days late rather than a whole week] as of the Samoa game on Sunday.
I’m watching on ITV Player. What a novelty! The picture freezes during the Welsh national anthem. I’m not sure if the pause is in the video feed that ITV are using or if it’s just a glitch on my internet connection. Either way it can’t be a good omen.
Commentating are Phil Vickery and, in a rather mercenary fashion, Nick Mullins. [Why no Welshman?] Ref is WYWG’s old schoolmate, Wayne Barnes. [Ah, cos the ref is “Welsh”]
James Hook’s first act at fullback (ugh) is to let a high ball ping off his shoulder. Good stuff. Wales are immediately penalised at the scrum. South Africa looking dangerous to start. And then, after 2m43s, they score a try. Start as you mean to go on, Wales! In the replay, we get to see F. Steyn’s hand off to Williams’s face and Hook’s somewhat weak last-ditch attempt at a try-saving tackle from a few different angles. [One of the key attributes that helped Steyn Jr over the line there is the enormous gut he’s developed since I last saw him play. He is the fattest fullback I think I’ve ever seen in international rugby. Good work sir.] M. Steyn makes the conversion. Did you know that in Australian Rules Football a hand off is known as a don’t argue? Those Aussies sure do have a way with words.
SA 7 - 0 Wales
Soon after the restart, Wales lose a lineout, pinch it back, but then immediately knock it on. And then ITV Player decides now would be a good time for me to start re-watching the game from the beginning. Isn’t technology remarkable? We’re living in the future!
Phil Vickery thinks that giving Wales a lineout at the halfway line puts them under pressure. Which, I suppose, given the quality of our lineout over the past few years, is a fair comment. Mullins: “Stephen Jones isn’t quite fit, struggling with a calf.” Perhaps wrestling livestock isn’t the best rehabilitation method?
Wales attack. Fourie flips little Shane clean upside-down in a tackle and dumps him on his head, apparently by accident. (Shane jumped into the tackle a little, as he has a propensity to do.) Then someone dives over the top of the ruck and Hook gets to kick a penalty. ITV Player freezes so I don’t get to see if he makes it, but Mullins tells me he does. Vickery thinks that’s a “great response” from Wales.
SA 7 - 3 Wales
Wales nick a lineout, and then Priestland kicks through and a big hit from Faletau wins Wales a scrum just inside the SA 22.
Goodness, Phil Vickery is a charismatic commentator. I wonder if you can book him for after dinner speeches. [I mean, seriously, it’s like someone slipped him two Tramadol before kick-off. He sounds like he’s boring himself to sleep.]
High tackle by Pietersen gives Wales another penalty. It looked like it went over from the camera angle we saw, in that the ball was inside the post the entire time, but the touch judges wave it off. Mullins is surprised, but when we see a replay (from the same angle) he confusingly decides that the ball definitely didn’t go over. [Really, what’s the point in having a quasi-Welsh ref if he’s not going to resolve the borderline calls in your favour?]
F. Steyn takes a mark and kicks it from within his own 22 to about 10 yards out from the Welsh try line. Big boot. [Big belly.] And then Roberts puts in a big hit on Burger. Unfortunately, Lydiate creeps offside and M. Steyn converts the penalty.
SA 10 - 3 Wales
Vickery thinks Wales just need to keep doing what they’re doing. They need to keep conceding ten points for every three they score?
Wales attack for a few phases, but then Hook chips the ball clean into touch. Several times in a row, Shane Williams takes the ball in midfield, runs a few yards, and then gives a hospital pass to a nearby forward. Then he performs a pretty dive pass from the base of a ruck, despite the fact that his scrum half is standing right there. That’s one way to get the ball out faster, I guess. [Is he teasing Mike Phillips? “Look Mikey, bet you can’t do this…” (Correct, he can’t.)]
Alarmingly, 24 minutes in, Wales have won four lineouts to SA’s 2. Oh, make that 4-3 in 25 mins. [The point still stands—the Welsh lineout after compulsorily fluffing the first attempt has been, whisper it, flawless. The Bennett-Charteris axis has been formidable. There’s a phrase you never expect to write…]
So far, Wales have had all the possession and all the territory. SA still up 10-3 on the score sheet, though.
Barnes fluffs a call at a collapsing scrum, and Vickery decides that that’s a good excuse to praise him.
Wales win another penalty (Burger not rolling away) and Hook makes no mistake this time.
SA 10 - 6 Wales
Hook completely shanks a kick after his mark. SA put together their first real attack for a while with a maul, but then give away a penalty. Shane takes it quickly and Wales surge into the SA half. F. Steyn lets off the pressure with another enormous kick. [Really his kicking is a wonder to behold. Or would be if it wasn’t so bloody annoying how he punishes Welsh errors by sending them back by about three-quarters of the length of the pitch. A mighty effective release for SA.]
Lineout tally is now SA three, Wales eight. And this is with Huw Bennett throwing-in! [It’s as if someone in the coaching set up thought ‘Hey, why don’t we throw 2-ball to our tallest player’—and that schoolboy basic has proved entirely effective at international level!] Mullins actually just uttered this line: “I believe you have a reservation for the Beast? Oh yes… Large portions.” It made sense at the time.
SA attack, and attempt a drop goal. Unsuccessful.
Just before the half, Hook has to take only his second high ball, and this time catches it cleanly. [See? Born to play fullback.]
We’ve reached 40 mins, but we have one more passage of play remaining. Wales win a scrum; Vickery’s commentary in its entirety: “Scruuum.” Wales win the ball, but don’t kick it straight into touch to end the half! That’ll please my liveblog partner. Instead Priestland attempts a looong drop goal. Unsuccessful. [And in all honesty about as realistically ambitious as kicking it straight out.]
Half time score: SA 10 - 6 Wales
In the studio, Gareth Thomas is satisfied with the Welsh effort. [Gareth has also precision trimmed his ginger beard, shined up his bald head to a gleam, and in the time honoured fashion of Welsh backs, looks like he’s paid a visit or two the tanning salon.] Francois Pienaar thinks SA need to step it up a gear. This despite the fact that SA are winning. The tyranny of low expectations?
Stats! Wales have had 57% of possession and 61% of the territory. [And about 35% of the points.]
Second Half
After the kick off, Faletau falls over onto his arse. Then he tries to get up, slips again, and rolls around on the floor. It’s honestly pretty amusing. SA concede a penalty (good work from Warburton) and Priestland kicks for touch. Wales win the lineout and attack. Mullins says, “This is Williams. First time we’ve really seen him with the opportunity to switch the lights on.” What?
Wales attack, but then Faletau drops the ball. He’s not having a good half so far! Butch James nails Roberts in a tackle and all of a sudden Wales are in trouble. Matfield is subbed off. De Villiers already came off early in the first half. Not good for them. Then they give away a penalty, and Wales get back into their half.
Priestland dinks a little ball through the SA line, which stops just in touch, and just in front of the SA try line. SA are forced to kick it into touch, and Wales win the lineout.
The Welsh forwards smash away through several phases. After an agonising minute or two, they spin it out, and SA immediately concede a penalty for being offside. [This is undeniably a good start to the second half by Wales; they look much more focused and disciplined than SA. Wales! Focused and disciplined!] After a brief period of advantage, Barnes blows the whistle, and Hook has a kick right in front of the posts.
SA 10 - 9 Wales
Wales immediately attack after the restart. Then my screensaver kicks in, and by the time I’ve thrown myself across the living room to turn it off, SA have the ball. They immediately concede a penalty.
Welsh lineout. Which they win. ITV have given up telling us the lineout stats, but I’m pretty sure they’ve won more this match than in the entire preceding Six Nations tournament. [Again, this is WITH Huw Bennett.] Wales spin it out. And then Faletau goes over the line for a try! I forgive him for his slapstick antics earlier in the half. [Also to be noted is young Toby’s old-school complete lack of celebration. Whilst his team-mates jump around and pump fists and all sorts of other soccer-style affectations, Toby accepts their congratulations stoically and jogs back to halfway with nary a glimmer of satisfaction on his face. Kudos young man, kudos.] Nick Mullins gets a bit over excited. Faletau’s a good Welsh name. (A bit rich coming from someone with the surname “Cheng”, I realise. WYWG is nothing if not hypocritical.) Hook makes the conversion.
SA 10 - 16 Wales
SA look a little peppier after the restart. Wales win it back, though, Priestland puts up a high ball, and Habana fumbles it into touch. From the lineout FALETAU comes surging through the back line, breaks a couple of tackles and hands off to Roberts, who makes it a few more metres to within about 5m of the SA try line. [Wales are ALL OVER the world champions here. Really, seriously, SA look there for the taking] Then he fumbles it though, and Wales concede a scrum. [Bugger, that should have been more points of some kind—being 6 ahead is nerve-shredding.]
Wales win another lineout. Seriously, what’s got into these boys? Wales attacking again, but SA turn the ball over.
Mullins starts to daydream about how great it would be if Wales beat the reigning World Champions in the first game of their campaign, and then tells us we shouldn’t get ahead of ourselves. Right. [Too late Nicholas, am way ahead of you on that daydream…]
Habana comes off and Hougaard comes on. If Mullins is saying it right, Hougaard is pronounced: “Ho-hard”. Now SA are attacking. Mullins: “No one yet is writing off these Springbok world champions.” Apart from you about five minutes ago, Nick!
Lineouts: SA 6 - 16 Wales
SA are attacking. It looks bad. Then they pass it forward. But they had the advantage for an earlier penalty. They kick for touch and win their lineout. I feel sick. [Likewise.] They spin it wide, but don’t find a way though. Back into the centre of the pitch, and then Hougaard the sub slides through the Welsh defence and swan dives over the line. Simple conversion for M. Steyn. Something went wrong in the Welsh defensive communication there. Nevertheless, SA have been mighty effective in turning possession into points which, for all the positives, Wales have not.]
SA 17 - 10 Wales
Bradley Davies comes on for Alun Wyn Jones, who’s had a great game. [Ditto entire Welsh pack.]
Jonathan Davies attempts a sneaky backhand offload from a tackle but the ball pops up to SA. [For some reason, this one chancy pass in an otherwise solid game from JD2 makes me absolutely livid. I leap from my sofa, wailing “Noooooooooo”, and slapping the wall with the flat of my hand. Hard. The plaster cracks. The children are watching. Not good.] They make a long clearance, Hook kicks it right back, SA fluff their next clearance, and Wales win a scrum about ten yards out. They run it in the forwards for a couple of phases, and then Priestland attempts a drop goal, but hooks it badly. He’ll be kicking himself about that one. [He’s 23 and it’s his fourth cap, so some slack should be cut… But that really should have gone over.]
Priestland makes a great long kick for touch. SA take it quickly. Hougaard and Steyn pass it back and forth between them 4 or 5 times [nearly all of which are forward!], and then Wales win a penalty. Cut to a shot of the Welsh bench, which elicits this from Mullins: “Andy Powell: the biggest, blondest cheerleader of them all.”
It’s a tricky kick, from the wrong touchline for Hook. He doesn’t make it. Mullins doesn’t blame him though. It’s windy out there, after all. [That’s two chances to win this game that Wales have failed to take. That’s not good enough.]
7 mins left.
Phillips takes an infeasibly long time setting up his forwards in two successive rucks. The South Africans capitalise by driving over the ruck to turn the ball over. Dammit, Phillips! They kick for space and then Hook returns the favour.
Sam Warburton is named man of the match [and rightly so].
4 mins left.
Lineouts: SA 8 - 17 Wales
South Africa eat up time by repeatedly driving in with the forwards.
1 min left. Welsh scrum inside their own 22. They win it. But SA turn it over and kick for touch to end the match.
Final Score: South Africa 17 - 16 Wales
To sum up, Wales played a solid, if not scintillating game [Maybe a little harsh. There were patches where Wales were really, seriously good. At points it was like watching an entirely different team to that which played in the Six Nations.] I wasn’t quite as impressed as the commentary team. (Mullins, for example, summed it up as “one of the Welsh great World Cup performances” and Rider described their performance as “quite heroic”. [On reflection, that is quite patronising.]) We had a lot of ball, but other than Faletau’s try, we didn’t look like we had any particular ideas what to do with it, which has been my grumble pretty much since the last grand slam win. [It was a little pre-programmed in parts, but then it was also patient and professional.] But it was competitive at least, and the forwards in particular looked very good. [And don’t forget Gethin’s back soon!] South Africa played like they didn’t give a crap.
Conclusion: Neither of these teams will win the World Cup. [Piffle my good man, Wales are going to tear up the history books and become the first team to win the World Cup after losing their first game. Mark my words.]
